I am amazed at all the perfect drivers in my community. You too probably have lots of them where you live.
I can easily recognize them because they always identify themselves when someone else commits a “driver’s sin.” I think we should institute a new law that says, “You who are without driver’s sin may cast the first (or middle) finger.”
Just recently I saw an elderly lady barely looking over the steering wheel of her car. As she drove, she allowed her car to drift ever so slightly into the next lane. Well, thank goodness there was a perfect driver directly behind her in the lane she was accidentally drifting into. He honked his horn in one long, loud continuous blast, sped up next to her, and gave her that wonderful, single-finger hand gesture that, I am sure, was meant to correct her mistake. Also, through his toothless mouth and unkempt beard, he shared some verbal corrections. I couldn’t quite hear his comments, but I’m pretty sure that they were in line with his corrective hand gesture.
Anyway, the woman was so upset at the fact that she had committed this driver’s sin, that she began to cry and shake. I slowed down to see how she was. She was pulling off to the side of the road, probably to pray a prayer of repentance and to recompose herself. Boy, it’s sure a good thing that nice man was there to help her in her time of “driver’s sin.” Obviously, he is a perfect driver.
One day I was in my car, and in front of me were two teenage girls. We were stopped at a red light waiting for it to change. When it did, the girls were oblivious to the light’s change. I sat waiting for them to notice that the light had changed, but I think the loud music on their radio and their head shaking caused them to miss the change. After awhile, I touched my horn ever so slightly to help the girls realize that the light had changed. Then, they both turned around and gave me the single-finger hand gesture that, I am sure, was meant to show their gratitude, and perhaps their perfection. How pleasant these teenage girls were. I wonder if their parents know how sweet their daughters are.
As I said, there must be a lot of perfect drivers in my community because I see them all the time casting their hand gestures at every small and large driver’s sin.
Why just the other day as I was driving to work, a very large man in a very large pickup truck was apparently trying to help me go faster. He was so close to the rear bumper of my car that I could see his nose hairs in my rearview mirror. Noting that the speed limit was 40 MPH and that I was, in fact already exceeding that by 2 MPH, I set my cruise-control and just enjoyed the show the man put on behind me. He reminded me of a monkey hopped up on caffeine. Quite a show actually. He occasionally hit his fist against his steering wheel and intermittently signaled to me that ever-pleasing, single-finger hand gesture that indicated to me that he thought that I was Number 1. Sweet.
Finally the oncoming lane cleared, and he passed me; as he did he showed me his need for dental work and a good washing of his right hand. Also, it was nice of him just about 50 yards later to wait for me at the red light. It gave me a whole new appreciation of this man’s sophistication as I read his various bumper stickers.
Maybe the most interesting (ironic? sad?) one was a couple of years ago. My wife and I were on vacation. It was a sunny Sunday morning. We were driving along a two-lane highway and the speed limit was 45. So, I set the cruise-control at 45, and we were enjoying the scenery. All along the highway there were small towns and stores and various things. Then, I noticed a car coming up behind me really fast; I thought the car would hit us, but then it slowed down. In my rearview mirror I could see a woman driver and a young female passenger, whom I assumed was the woman's daughter. The driver kept right on top of my rear bumper, and I could see that she was both in a hurry and very agitated. Then, a short—and unsafe to pass—section of the road became clear and the woman passed us. I slowed down to allow her plenty of room to get past me. As she drove by, she did not give the customary single-finger hand gesture, but she glared at me and since our windows were down, we could hear her yelling some choice, vitriolic four-letter words. Soon her car was around a bend in the road and gone. However, the story does not end there. Less than a quarter mile after that, we saw her car again. She had parked in a church parking lot where other parishioners were milling about outside and talking with one an other. I slowed way down, and we saw the woman, now out of her car with her daughter at her side greeting other church members with a "holy hug." I cannot tell you how tempted I was to stop at that church, go inside, and "park" myself in front of that woman for the service. But, instead—and at the wise counsel of my wife—I continued on down the road enjoying the drive. However, I could not help but think of what that Christian woman was teaching her daughter by her actions that day.
Recently a friend of mine pulled away from a stop sign and went through an intersection. Apparently, he hadn’t looked carefully enough because as he drove through, the driver of a truck coming toward him blared his horn and gave that wonderful, corrective, single-fingered hand gesture. The truck driver had a couple of young children in the front seat with him. How nice of this man to take the time to teach his children while they are so young how to correct others on the roadway.
The other day I committed a driver’s sin. I thought I had carefuly looked before I drove onto the roadway, but apparently I hadn’t. I nearly hit a car driven by a middle-aged women. I swerved back toward the curb to correct my mistake, and as she passed by I was expecting the corrective single-finger hand gesture, but to my pleasant surprise, she just shrugged her shoulders and smiled as she drove by. Apparently she too had committed a driver’s sin at one time, so she didn’t have the right to “cast the first (or middle) finger.”
"What has this to do with any type of spirituality?"
Answer: What about practical Christian ethics? If you need a verse, how's this:
"So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you,
for this sums up the Law and the Prophets" Matthew 7:12
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